As human beings, we naturally yearn for intimacy, connection and love. However, receiving and tolerating love is not always easy. Many of us have deep-seated fears of intimacy that make being in a close relationship excrutiating. The experience of love and intimacy can threaten our self-defences and raise our anxiety levels as we become vulnerable to another person. Falling in love is not only exciting and fulfilling but it also raises fear around rejection and potential loss.
Our ability to tolerate love and intimacy begins during our first years of life. If we experienced developmental trauma, hostile parenting or overlooked by our caregivers, we may have a hard time receiving or giving intimacy. Without the right support or secure adult relationships later in life, we may continue to struggle with intimacy and feelings of disconnection.
Through sex therapy we can gain the necessary support and insight to overcome fear of intimacy. We can break old patterns of relating and overcome limiting beliefs that stop us from giving and receiving love. We can begin to recognize the behaviours that are driven by our fear of vulnerability and challenge these defensive reactions that preclude love and sexual intimacy.